A

aghastishness ^sms

(noun)

1. The quality of being not completely aghast, just “aghastish.” Rel.: aghasty; aghastish (adj.).

B

birthwrong ^sms

(noun)

1. Something bad you inherited genetically or materially. Antonym: birthright.

C

Caller E.D. ^sms

(noun)

1. The deflation one feels when the person calling you on the phone is not the person you were hoping was going to call.

chattacker ^sms

(noun)

1. Someone who surprises you with an unwanted IM or chat message, usually when you least want/expect it. Rel.: to chattack (verb); chattack (noun); chattacking (gerund).

cousin-german ^sms

(noun/adjective)

1. (noun) Synonym for “first cousin,” according to Webster’s. I have never heard this term in my life. 2. (adj.) The Shrake-tionary prefers to make it an adjective expressing that weird feeling of uncanniness one gets from cousins, and from Germans. With cousins: They look kind of like you, but you almost always have nothing in common culturally, personality-wise, intellectually. Ditto for Germans. E.g.: “I met him through my good friend, and I tried to talk to him but he was very cousin-german.”

D

de-car ^sms

(verb)

1. To disembark from an automobile. Related: de-train, de-plane (and other such questionable neologisms).

denial-aiding comparison ^sms

(noun)

An absurdly far-fetched comparison used to minimize a problem you are in denial about, such as alcoholism, spendaholism, sexaholism, rageaholism. Examples: 1. “I know I drink too much sometimes, but it’s not like I’m kidnapping newborns from hospitals and selling them on the black market to get enough money to pay for all the booze I drink!” 2. “I just like to gamble, that’s all. So I lose more than I wanted to sometimes, so what? It’s not like I’ve lost my house, car, and all my belongings and have had to scam my children and grandchildren out of their houses, cars, and belongings too! I mean, come on. I’m not that bad.”